Why Self-Care is Essential for Moms
What Is Self-Care and Why It Matters?
As a doula and someone who’s spent years supporting families, I can tell you with full confidence: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Self-care isn’t a luxury or something that has to wait until the kids are older. Nor does it need to be a time consuming or expensive task. It’s a daily act of preservation and love for yourself, with the added bonus of benefiting your family. When you feel more grounded, you parent with more patience, clarity, and joy (and you're also likely to give yourself more grace!)
The Impact of Self-Care on Your Mental & Physical Health
Caring for others begins with caring for yourself. Carving out time for self-care improves your mental clarity, reduces stress, strengthens your immune system, and supports hormone regulation. It helps you show up as the parent you want to be, not the one running on fumes.
Recognizing the Unique Challenges Moms Face
Let’s be real: modern motherhood is intense. Between the invisible labor, emotional weight, and the constant pressure to "do it all," it can be hard to remember your own needs. Whether you're a stay-at-home parent, juggling a job, or somewhere in between, finding time for yourself can feel impossible. That’s why self-care needs to be redefined—as something small, simple, and sacred.
Understanding Your Self-Care Needs
Assessing Your Personal Wellness Priorities
Everyone’s needs look different. Some of us feel recharged by alone time, others by connection. Start by asking: What makes me feel restored? Energized? Seen? Understanding your wellness priorities helps you choose the self-care practices that will actually make an impact.
Overcoming Common Barriers: Time Constraints, Guilt, and Limited Support
- Time: You don’t need an hour. You need ten minutes and some intention. A cup of tea in silence. A deep breath with the door closed.
- Guilt: You’re not taking time away from your family. You’re investing in showing up better for them.
- Support: Ask for help when you can ( Your partner, family members, friends, kind neighbors, a doula). And if it’s not available, simplify wherever possible. Repeat after me: "Asking for help is not a sign of weakness!"
Defining What Self-Care Means for You
Self-care isn’t one-size-fits-all. It might look like a walk in fresh air, saying no to an extra commitment, or turning off your phone for 20 minutes. Think in terms of:
- Physical: Moving your body, nourishing meals, rest
- Mental/Emotional: Journaling, therapy, talking with a friend
- Self-Development: Reading, learning something new, personal projects (what did you love to do BEFORE being a mother? Reconnect with her.)
Practical Self-Care Strategies for Busy Moms
Quick & Realistic Self-Care Tips
Mindfulness and Meditation Practices
Even two minutes of mindful breathing can reset your whole day. Use an app, or simply close your eyes and focus on your breath, in for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds, repeat 3x.
Outdoor Walks and Physical Activity
Fresh air is magic. Whether it’s a stroller walk, solo jog, or just standing outside for a deep breath, moving your body changes everything.
Creative Tasks & Mini Breaks
Doodle, bake, write, organize your closet by color. Creativity sparks joy and gives you a mental break. Even five minutes helps. You can even involve your little ones in this (they often want to be included, not distracted!)
Building and Maintaining a Custom Self-Care Routine
How to Create a Weekly Self-Care Schedule
Look at your week and identify windows of opportunity. They don’t have to be perfect. Maybe Monday is a quick face mask, Wednesday is a phone call with a friend, and Friday is takeout to avoid cooking. Map it out in a way that feels doable to your unique life.
Building Your Personalized Self-Care Kit
What brings you calm and comfort?
- Essentials: A cozy blanket, tea, journal, candles
- Tools & Apps: Meditation apps, gratitude journals, music playlists, guided breathing tools
Keep these items in one spot so they’re easy to grab when you need them.
Self-Care on a Tight Schedule: Tips When You Have Little (or No) Support
- Wake up 10 minutes earlier for a quiet moment
- Play calming music or an audiobook while you tidy up
- Trade off nap time duties if you have a partner
- Remember: tiny is enough. A single deep breath is still self-care
Self-Care for Mental Health and Emotional Well-Being
Recognizing Burnout, Postpartum Depression, and Signs of Stress
Motherhood doesn’t have to feel like drowning. If you feel exhausted beyond the physical, numb, hopeless, or detached—you’re not alone, and you’re not failing. Talk to your provider, doula, or a mental health professional. Support is out there. EPDS.
Integrating Mental Health Practices into Your Daily Life
Journaling, Affirmations, and Mindful Breathing
- Journaling: Get the thoughts out of your head and onto paper.
- Affirmations: Repeat things you believe or want to believe. “I am allowed to take up space.” “I am doing my best, that can look different everyday, and thats okay!"
- Mindful Breathing: Inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale for 8. Repeat.
The Role of Therapy and Professional Support
Therapy is not just for when things are "bad." It’s a powerful way to stay connected to yourself and process all the emotional shifts of parenthood. If therapy feels out of reach, look for support groups, telehealth therapy, or sliding scale options.
Conclusion
Self-care doesn’t have to be a big thing. Yes of course who wouldn't love a spa or vacation?? But don't underestimate the power of a soft moment in a loud day. A reminder that you matter, too. I see so many parents trying to give everything to their children. I promise: one of the most powerful things you can give them is you, cared for and replenished.
You've got this. And we're here for you.
Check out FoodNerd’s Parent Resources for more strategies and ideas to support your parenting journey!
With love,
